Teenagers and Quotes

Mother Nature is providential. She gives us twelve years to devolpe a love for our children before turning them into teenagers. - William Galvin

It's amazing. One day you look at your phone bill and realize they're teenagers.
- Milton Berle

Between the ages of tweleve and seventeen a parnt can age thirty years.- Sam Levenson

My little boys are growing up...
The baby's five-foot three!
It's great, but must they take such pride
In looking down on me?
- Susan D. Anderson

There used to be a saying that once your kid got old enough to help around the house, he was no longer around the house to help.
- Theresa Bloomingdale

No need to worry about your teenagers when they're not at home. A national survey revealed that they all go to the same place -'out'- and they all do the same thing -'nothing'.
-Bruce Lansky

When the phone rings, it's for your teenager. When the phone bill arrives, it's for you.
- Bruce Lansky

Puberty is the stage children reach that gets parents to start worrying about pregnancy all over again.
- Joyce Armor

One thing you can never find in a teenagers room is the floor. - Bruce Lansky

There is nothing wrong with teenagers that reasoning with them wont aggrivate.
- Anonymous

Never lend your car to anyone to whome you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

If Abraham's son had been a teenager, it wouldn't have been a sacrifice. - Scott Spendlove

When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. - Mark Twain

I have a daughter who goes to S.M.U. She could've gone to U.C.L.A. here in California, but it's got one more letter she'd have to remember. - Shecky Greene

Much worse then rebellious teenagers are those who don't rebel and refuse to leave home.- Bruce Lansky

I gave my son a hint. On his room door I put a sign: CHECKOUT TIME IS 18.
- Milton Berle

There isn't a child who hasn't gone out into the brave new world who eventually doesn't return to the old homestead carrying a bundle of dirty clothes. - Art Buchwald

The bill from college came today For all our childrens' fees; As parents we are doomed to grow Much poorer by degrees. - Charles Ghigna

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The Best Son

There was this little old lady who was nearly blind and she had three sons who wanted to prove which one was the best son to her.

So Son #1 bought her a 15-room mansion thinking this would surely be the best any of them could offer her.

Son #2 bought her a beautiful Mercedes with a chauffeur included thinking her would surely win her approval.

Son #3 had to do something even better than these so he bought her a trained parrot that had been training for 15 years to memorize the entire Bible. You could ask of him any verse in the Bible and the parrot could quote it word for word. What a gift that would be.

Well, the old lady went to the first son and said, "Son, the house is just gorgeous but it's really much too big for me. I only live in one room, and it's much too large for me to clean and take care of. I really don't need the house, but thank you anyway."
Then she confronted her second son with "Son, the car is beautiful, it has everything you could ever want on it, but I don't drive and I really don't like that driver, so please return the car."

Next, she went to son number three and said, "Son I just want to thank you for that most thoughtful gift. That chicken was delicious."